A time of decision has come upon me, and now has also passed. A time where I had a choice, or so I thought. It seemed as though I could choose the safe road, or the difficult one. It was also a time of determination and confidence, if only for a brief moment, in my strength to overcome the difficult. My thoughts then turned to the writings of Rainer Maria Rilke.
We know little, but that we must trust in what is difficult is a certainty that will never abandon us; it is good to be solitary, for solitude is difficult; that something is difficult must be one more reason for us to do it. (Letters To A Young Poet, Seven)
Thus, what I really wanted,was to take the difficult road. It would have been glorious. Yet I had no one cheering for me along the way. I had no one to fly my flag. And no one pledged their support for me, should I choose this way. My resolve weakened slightly, yet I held firm to the belief that this is what I should do.
Ere long the universe conspired with the naysayers to take from me even this choice. Before my eyes the difficult road, which held so much promise, vanished to reveal nothing but a sheer wall. An impenetrable barrier which made it clear to me that the easy road I now must travel. What is easy, is also what is dull. And now I can only hope that I have the strength and determination to persevere through it.